the first signs of fall...

don't be afraid...

this is a piece that i made on friday. i used some of the new techniques i recently learned about, and i'm really happy with the way it turned out. the computer cut off part of the right edge where i had the words "trust your love" in the upper right corner, but the rest of the piece scanned pretty well.

when i began working on this on friday morning, i wasn't sure what the final result would be. i smile every time i look at it, because i really think that God was speaking words of Truth and encouragement to me as i made this.

i pray that this brings a little bit of Truth, love, and encouragement into your day. much LOVE!

rise and shine!

my mom was collecting roosters for a while, so i painted her this picture for christmas this past december... i'm thinking i might paint a picture of a cow - since i love them so very much - in this same style some day...



today i'm having a lot of fun trying out some new techniques i read about... i'll post the finished project up here when i'm done. i'm truly overwhelmed by God's goodness to me (and rick's!). i love art so much, and that's what i'm able to do for hours at a time right now. all while drinking coffee and painting in my pajamas. this is the life! much love, my friends!

Truth and grace for today...

i saw this on anne's facebook, and my heart keeps coming back to it...

Each person is given something to do that shows who God is.
1 Corinthians 12:7 MSG

this is Truth. what is that thing for each of us that shows others who God is? or is it not so much the thing itself, but rather us honoring who God has created us to be? our true self?

i haven't worked on any art in a while... my dear friend, rick's aunt, michaella asked me why i thought that was... i told her probably fear and my insecurities. what if people don't like it? what if they don't buy it? mainly - what if people reject what i've created - the expression of my heart?

i talked to anne this morning, and i felt like the Spirit was giving me Truth to speak to her - about how her gift of writing, her heart for prayer are from God, and how the broken people in her life who hurt her and let her down (or are just apathetic to her gifts), should not keep her from doing the things God had put in her heart to do - from being the person God has created her to be.

but, like most times when God gives me Truth to speak to my friends, i think it was Truth for me, too.

when michaella and i were talking the other day, and i expressed my fears to her, she told me that she thinks i should create, and do my art, regardless of whether people will buy it or not... to me, someone buying something i've created is validation. if they don't buy it (or don't respond kindly to it), it's rejection. on the surface, they are rejecting the product. but for anyone who creates from the heart, whether it be music, writing, artwork - it feels like rejection of our true selves.

michaella's point was that if God has put this desire to create in my heart, i need to honor that desire. whether people - whether the world - accepts or approves or validates it is irrelevant. i'm not doing it for them anyways, right? i'm doing it for me - and for Jesus. or at least i was when i first began...

Lord, thank you for speaking your Truth to me today. thank you for your patience, your mercy, and your grace. thank you for dear friends who encourage me. please help me - help all of us - to stay anchored in your love and Truth, in who you have created me and called me to be. protect my heart from false fears and insecurities... guide me always back to You.

a few unexpected visitors...

yesterday was a lovely rainy, stormy day... and a few feathered friends stopped by my little tree outside our apt.

the geese only stayed long enough to let me take a couple pictures and to poop on the sidewalk...

then, i noticed a little green friend on the sidewalk leading up to our apt.

i was amazed at how close he let me get to him to take these pictures...









isn't he gorgeous? i love his gold eyes!
he stayed on my front walk for quite a while... i think he liked the attention i was giving him. he definitely needs a name... something regal and sophisticated... i think i shall call him giovanni. perhaps he's of italian descent. ciao!

a small glimpse of spring in michigan...

i took a few pictures of the tree right outside of our apt. last week. all winter it was bare, and then a few weeks ago, almost over-night, it had the most beautiful pink blooms on it. this past week, the blooms turned into delicate white flowers.

the past few days the wind has blown most of the flowers off the branches... i felt like i was in a fairy-land every time i walked by the tree, white petals swirling around me, landing gracefully in my hair.

sad to say, i didn't get any pictures of it with the white flowers, thinking i still had some time before they would all fall off. last night we had a storm come through, and the wind blew all of the beautiful white blossoms to the ground. my mom said that the blossoms fall off, and then the tree will get berries and new growth. isn't nature amazing? God's creativity constantly overwhelms and inspires me.

the tree with the pink buds on it:

all the white on the ground is petals from the tree:

the tree this morning (with a few white flowers still holding on to the branches after last night's storm):

"dirty dancing" strikes again...

rick's aunt gave us a painting of jesus she bought in poland when she visited there last month. it's about 5 inches wide by 7 inches tall, and it came with little wood pegs (like a stand, so that you can display it).

in our dining room, in the corner between two of the benches at our kitchen table, we have our nativity scene still set up (we kept it up all year in our apt. in austin).

the following conversation took place a few nights ago while discussing where we should put the picture...

michele: well, we could take down our nativity scene - it doesn't HAVE to stay out all year - and we could put the painting in the corner.

rick (in a voice, that i'm guessing was intended to sound like patrick swayze's): nobody puts jesus in the corner!

today was a day.

i typed the following on december 18th, but i didn't post it. i've been doing that a lot lately. not sure why. maybe it's because i don't feel like i'm able to completely articulate the way i'm feeling through my writing, so i get frustrated - and then don't share what i've written. but since you are my dear friends, i know you'll have grace for this blog, for the fact that my ability to write my thoughts out in a way that satisfies me is a work in progress... mainly, grace for me.


currently, my eyes are tired and red and puffy from crying. i cried for a good hour tonight. it's been a while since i've cried like that.

my husband is sick. and i hate that. i hate not being able to make him feel better.

i miss my friends. i have good friends in michigan (namely, andi & brad), and i'm so thankful to be back with them and with my family. but i miss my texas friends. i miss my church. i miss my family.

i wonder why God has me in michigan. what purpose could my being here serve? being home all the time is beginning to wear on me. i'm lonely. i feel as if my spirit is weak. i tell rick, "i have to get out of here. i'm going to go to the store, or something." and he looks at me. we sit down on the couch, and i begin to cry. i tell him that i'm sad. that i miss my friends. that i feel overwhelmed by all of the nothing-ness in my life. i need out. my husband lovingly looks at me, and tries to comfort me, but i cannot be comforted. not at this moment.

and then God shows me love. shows me grace. shows me He's there.

the phone rings. it's mandi. and i cry to my friend. i tell her i miss her. i tell her that i don't know what's wrong, but that i'm sad. and she listens. she speaks truth to me. she loves me. and through her, Jesus listens, speaks truth, and loves me.

rick and i eat our ham and cheese omelets for dinner. i'm feeling strengthened. as i get ready to go to the grocery store, the phone rings again. it's anne. before answering the phone, rick says to me, "another one of your friends who loves you is calling to talk to you."

anne and i talk about what's going on with us... we laugh. i tell her that if she had called an hour earlier, i would have been crying. i tell her i miss her. i think i might start crying again, but she says something random, and i start laughing again. i talk to her while i drive to kroger's. we talk and joke and rant and laugh as i place the milk, eggs, mini-marshmallows, and bananas into my shopping cart. and the laughter is healing. what a gift.

and i realize that God is loving me through all of this... the entire day. even in my loneliness. especially in my loneliness. He is so good, so faithful. i love you, Jesus.

quote of the day...

"aww! i didn't want to be famous for being mean... i wanted to be famous for catching santa claus!"

- homer simpson

a morning in the life...

i woke up this morning with terrible cramps. i took some advil, sprawled out on our couch, and proceeded to watch "britney: for the record" on MTV. yeah, i don't know.

i looked out the window, watching the snow falling down, swirling around... and noticed some activity by the pumpkins that are still decorating our patio. a squirrel had gnawed his way through half of one of the smaller pumpkins. for almost an hour this animal gorged itself on the orange innards of the small squash, leaving a mess behind for me to clean up. i guess that's what i get for having pumpkins outside my front door in december.

"Hear my cry, O God; listen to my prayer. From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is higher than I. For you have been my refuge, a strong tower against the foe."





Psalm 61: 1-3

what a blessing it has been to be back in michigan for the changing of the seasons. fall in michigan is SO beautiful.

this past week has been very cold and windy, and so many of the leaves have fallen off of these trees. winter is right around the corner. the changing of the leaves, the trees, the seasons are a reminder to me of God's goodness and His faithfulness.

the transition of leaving texas and moving to michigan has been more difficult than i thought it was going to be. i miss our texas family, our church, the city of austin.

i find comfort in God and in rick. truth is spoken to me. Jesus loves me and is with me. He does not disappoint.

though the trees will soon be barren, i pray that i'll find hope in their empty branches - that they will be a symbol to me of patience. of waiting. of trusting that new life will come.